A book can’t tell you to be quiet
I’m a very verbal person. I say what I feel and do it, if at all possible. I hate to be shot down and I hate to be discouraged. I was trying to be in my husband’s world. I thought I had at least opened the door, but once again he shut me out. While watching basketball playoffs (mind you-the playoffs are serious business), I got a little excited. I believe, if I’m going to be watching TV (which is a rarity) it must command my attention to the point of interaction. Most times while I watch I will scream out my comments so that I can be there. It was so tonight, and I was firmly told to stop. The first time I did it, I tried to hold my piece. However the second time I had to laugh and he didn’t like it. So I gave up, I grabbed the dirty dinner plates, threw them away and retreated to the sanctuary of my bedroom. My bedroom is a constant where I abide in blissful ignorance of the TV, news, and outside goings on. So now I’m frustrated because I put in an obvious effort to gain some time with him and was dismissed. I even put in a hint to possible intimacy latter on, with some casual flirting earlier in the evening. Now I find myself totally turned off. He will no doubt never realize the hurt he administered and will eagerly come to bed with intimacy on his mind. Maybe I will take some pain meds just to be asleep before he retires for bed. I just don’t feel like explaining to him that he turned me off, when he shut me out.
16 May 2006
A book cant tell you to be quiet
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